arrg
i fucking hate everything right now. ive heard that a million times, but im so livid i cant express it better....
school is awful. i cant stand like ANYONE...J(XY) was really getting on my nerves today. well, he has been a lot lately.
all the cool kids at school...just seeing them ruins my day. and how E(XX) has been so fucking stuck up i just wanna hit her so hard. her and i have been friends for years, and my patience with her has just gone threadbare. im still being nice to her. like, when i see her...and we talk...but otherwise, i dont exist. i just cant wait for school to finish....im x'ing out the days on each one of my calendars. every day is so long. its april 9th....
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so ive got like 50 days total, weekends and everything of school left. AARRGG!! stabmestabmestabme.

one good thing though is that im starting to dig K(XY) but the thing is...ive never met him...we talk online. he lives in TX. and like...we have so much in common. like...i feel like im gonna go insane if i dont get to talk to him for a day. thats how serious i feel about him...and i really love talking to him, its the highlight of my day....but then...when i do talk to him, i get sad cause i cant be near him....i miss him and i havent even met him yet. i miss having a boyfriend. yeah, i actually do. but i think once i get one, itll be different...than me and my ex. that relationship was just whacked out...so, i cant wait for K(XY) to visit me this summer....itll be so great. ill feel sooooo happy. one week. thats all i get....every bit of happiness i get takes so long to achieve.
im really fucking sick of it....me and K(xy) plan on meeting...if things go well, (which i know they will) we plan on travelling together...we both really hate where we live and are in the same home situation...kinda..ive just got 4x as many people living with me...
im gonna break soon.
ive got a massive headache.
i wish everyone would just stop talking so i could sleep.
please.
save.
me.
fuck.