fuck dood, last nite i typed out this thing after he dropped me off...didnt come out..ill try to recreate it...

he picked me up at around 3. we drove around all the way out to PHOENIX (which i love) and just talked and talked and talked...thats not normal for us. im usually pretty quiet around him, for some reason, probably cause i usually listen. but he was really happy. and that rubbed off on me, and he said "whats up with you today? youre being all goofy" and i said that im normally like that, but it depends on who im around. i reflect how theyre feeling...we just had a ton of fun...

hung out with dave of the 10 commandments. he was really really nice. i wish i could meet more people like that around here. it was really funny cause i watched them do a drug deal. then i held the papers. then i watched P(XY) roll a joint in the car. under a "PHOENIX POLICE IS NOW HIRING" sign. ha ha ha.

he took me out to dinner at little schezwan (SP?) and it was great. a bit quiet...he kept saying he wanted to buy me stuff...just cause ive been so nice/patient with him...well...thats how i am with everyone. thats how i treat everyone. we both dont meet a lot of nice people..

he later told me a bunch of great things i wanted to hear. im pretty sure he meant all of it, since he always kept saying "i dont want you to get attached, i dont want this to be hard for you" but...
he said:
"i get really excited thinking about meeting you in chicago...picking you up at the train station..even if i dont live in chicago yet, ill take the train there and pick you up"
"you are so beautiful...im going to miss looking into your eyes..like, when i get off, id just have to think of those eyes of yours..you look like christie brinkley right now..."
"you know what? when you get out there, you are spending the nite with me NO MATTER WHAT. im really looking foreward to sleeping in the same bed as you. itll be a total comfort thing for me"
then today, he called me and told me to meet him at the 99c store. i did. didnt spend that long. we sat in the parking lot for a bit..then he drove across university and said i was beautiful...again..sat in my driveway, and just HUGGED. i didnt wanna let go. kissed...kept kissing...about to get out...kiss...hug..he told me to never change. and that things will be so fun in the future. (i shed a few tears) and that ill always be 16 to him.
gosh........
i got out. he handed me the cd case. said hes going to miss me.
i got back in. kissed him again...and started walking to my door....
he honked.
blew me a kiss.
i blew him a kiss...
and he drove off.
he said hell call me from truck stops. and well still talk a lot. im glad. itll be fun keeping in touch with him, sending packages and stuff. i want him to see the me that i was yesterday, cause he really liked it.

just....last nite was just great. lying in bed..just talking. i was kinda..ya know.....and i was just snuggling with him hardcore. he said he was starting to get sad, and hes going to miss the important people here. im one of the few of them. gosh!!!!

maybe there is a future for him and me.
i dont know.
he sure is a great guy. <3 <3 <3