i still dont feel quite up to par...i havent for about a week, since a party with mi amigas. thats why i dont drink all that much....and partially cause i cant get ahold of the good stuff. lame. if i were in europe, id be fine! ahha. you can drink there at 16. the i wouldnt be wretching allover, props to the Capt'n. *shudder* i hate captain morgan. i hate it with a passion. the coconut vodka is okay, but not when you drink half the bottle and can taste it 3 days afterward...uugh. yes, i am the epitomy of sixteen.

i gotta get up early in the morning. im going to matsuri with the paternal unit. great great. i dont mind, but i just hope he isnt racist..thats so embarassing....especially when we were in NY...holy shit, him and the accent and that hat...or when we go to mexican food places...christ! he IS jesus. he likes god so much....i feel strange because im straying from my from-birth "faith" i was born "christian" but then we almost joined this cult (on acciedent of course) when i was about 3...and then we joined another church..and then we stopped, and like, never went again..but my mother told me to keep faith while her and my father were going through a divorce. my sister went to christian school, and it was awful. they treated us like we were the devil....cause my parents were divorced. anyways, i just realized the other day how hypocritcal chrisitianity is....and im still all confused about religion. i guess im at that age. my sister became wiccan at around my age, or a year older. but she did it to an extremety, and it was a big ha-ha-ha joke. like, the craft...trying to float pencils and change your eye colors n shit. haha. black lipstick.
so, in result of all this thinking up in the brain of my milky self, ive kind of decided that im going to look into buddhism. it goes a lot with my personal beliefs. but one thing i kind of object with is not using alcohol. dammit! im sure i can find a loophole. oh no..lookit me now.
i feel so self concious lately. i dont like it. i feel like a girl. i feel kind of fat. oh my god. teenage years. well, i know i can fix it. im just so tired lately. so tired i just eat and eat and eat...not good. i mean, i lost 30lbs, i can tone myself up all good, like when i used to figure skate. ive still got skaters legs. mwuahahha. theyre all big n strong. bling bling..or as tim meddows would say BOOYAH! (byob-bring your own BOOYAH!) thats so gonna be over used tomarrow. i know it. i love how me n emily watch the same things (although i dont watch much tv) but we talk about it and make it eleventy billion times more funny than it actually is. i miss her. im gonna make her and i hang out more often!
and im gonna make her fuck aaron nagel tomarrow. with creammmm cheese.
and im gonna say "what about nate?"
and then ill dance around and make boys dance with me.
tomarrow is a vintage adidas day.