so i wake up to my father ringing my phone, asking me to go to his baptism...well...hmm. he told me about it, but never specified a time. he gives me shite cause im not psychic. dammit. so im talking to him, half asleep, and hes like "oh! you dont care! youre asleep! goodbye! goodnite!" and he HANGS UP ON ME.
fuck.
usually, that wouldnt get to me, if it were anyone else, but im so eager to please my father..(dont ask)
so like the lame ass baby i am, i start to cry, cause he always does this to me. im not good enough.
he makes me cry a lot.
like when i took my permit test the first time and failed. by two.
ugh....
anyways, i called him back, sucked up my courage and said "what should i do? get ready?!" and hes like "NO! thatll make me LATE!" and im like, "why lay guilt on me for something i didnt know? if you wouldve specified a time, i wouldve gone." and he goes off into excuses....*sigh!* and then, i went on to say, "well, i know youre going to lay guilt on me if i dont go." and hes like "no! why would i do such a thing!?"
(he does crap like that...uugh. hes a business man, his schedule, his life...control...money...religion..women?! man!!! ahh!)
so....here i am waiting for him...hes going to take me to matsuri, but HE voulenteered. uuh. he said 11. it is approxametly 11:54 am.
christianity takes FOREVER!!!!!!!!
ahhh!
jesus!
i got this lame-ass pit stain on my frikkin blue meanies shirt. thanks a lot dumb luck! its cool though.
my mother told me im "too tiny" just a bit ago. little does she know ive gained 5lbs cause of my laziness as of late. ugh. i wish i could get back to 125, like when i was in junior high. M(XY) told me last nite that he likes me cause im kind of chubby...umm?? what the hell is going on here??
am i fat? am i too tiny?! dammit.
well, in my teenage opionion, i just need to work out more. its so hard though, cause im soooo tired. i only get about 6-7 hrs of sleep a day. ouch. then i go to school for 8 hrs, and i got 2hrs of commuting in there.
valley metro.
haha.
fat smelly man on the bus.
lady who read calligraphy books.
<3<3<3 ummm...i have school tomarrow. its summer up here *points to head* im waiting for yoichis next letter telling me when hes coming to the USA. hes adorable. i cant wait to drive him all fast around the valley and show him how fucking gross/sad it is. i live in the "opportunity zone" hmm...im still yet to find out what this "opportunity" is. i think its code talk for "kid, you live in the ghetto. this is just a sign proving it" i like this antville thing cause i can just babble without seeming like a loser. jimmy! youre the only one who knows about it, and i dont expect you to read it. im a boring fuck. hopefully ill see some nice eyecandy at matsuri today....mmmmmmmm. im so picky. i love boys though. im a perv. i just stare...mmmmm.....well, my finger hurts and im kind of pissed off. i have to do my reading assignment for voltaires "candide" i kinda dig it, but the whole 18th century wit is kinda hard to pick up... haha... high school.